Lifnei Iver- Frum Porn Search Edition

13 Nov

David Frum: Frum porn searchers' arch nemesis

There are a lot of different ways people stumble onto this blog, but one of the most common is searching for frum porn. It’s fascinating to me how many permutations of “frum girls naked” I get in the search bar. Some of these make me feel bad though. Some horny guy is desperately searching for something he’ll probably never find, he gets a hit, and lands on a blog. I imagine I’ve been the cause of quite a few tears and muffled curses. I’m also fairly certain that if Google predictive search was totally open, there would be no unporn-related hits for at least 50 lines.

That’s probably why they do it though. You’re looking for a restaurant in town. You start typing “Barbeque grill”, b- boobs, ba- balls, bar- Did you mean bra-less teens? You forget what you started searching for, decide to reheat some cholent, and jerk off. Nobody would leave the house, and eventually all non-porn businesses would just shut down.

Let’s get to the list:

Frum’s first:

frumgirl

frum sex -“david frum”

frum porn

frum girls gone wild

frum and naked

frum girl pictures

frum+yeshivish+porn

frum cheaters

frum bais yaakov nude

frum girl ass

frum horny bochur

Now Yeshiva:

horny yeshiva bochur

best yeshivish sex story

yeshivish slut

yeshiva jerk off

my kallah naked -Interesting spin here.

Bais Yaakov:

bais yaakov sex

bais yaakov boobs

bais yaakov girls gone bad

bais yakov catskills sex

bais yaakov girls party

bais yaakov girls

chassidishe slut

aladdin porn -Someone’s a bit young to be searching for porn.

how to get laid as a yeshiva bochur

romney 2012 porn -Wtf?

jewish girl

mesorah giral porno -??

nude women honour our heroes -Some people know what to give.

yeshiva porn

high school memories porn

keep masturbating will cause what -I’ll tell you when I get to the end.

5 Responses to “Lifnei Iver- Frum Porn Search Edition”

  1. frum single female November 13, 2011 at 10:52 pm #

    lol

  2. Gutman Braun November 16, 2011 at 2:09 pm #

    1st part of your post: That’s better than poetry, brother. :-)

    The list: Please tell me that this is (mostly) satire, and not the actual list of searches that arrived here…

    • itchemeyer November 16, 2011 at 11:45 pm #

      About the 1st part- thanks! Though I don’t understand what you mean by comparing it to poetry. (Admittedly, I don’t read too much poetry.)

      About the list: Nope. All true. Copy and paste (plus my commentary).

    • itchemeyer November 16, 2011 at 11:47 pm #

      There must be such a dearth of frum porn that any site that has key words anywhere on the page gets hit.

  3. aidantrent August 12, 2012 at 7:12 pm #

    *snicker*

    I suspect they’d have better success with a dedicated porn search engine

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