Tag Archives: music

Yelling Till You’re Pink

29 Nov

The Jblogosphere reports that speeches at the recent Agudah convention were focused on bashing things like the internet and something called post-haredism. Speaking of people yelling angrily about things they don’t quite understand, what the hell happened with Pink?

A long time ago, Pink had a genuine hit. My theory is that Pink didn’t quite understand what exactly the hit factor was in that song, and since then has been on a quest to figure it out. With increasingly embarrassing results. Her latest idea (still on the radio for some unfathomable reason) is to repeat phrases she hears the kids saying with no attempt at understanding them first.

Seriously: ‘Party crasher, penny snatcher, call me up if you are gangsta’?? Why isn’t there some manager or someone to say, “No, Pink, no.”

“Oh, but I keep hearing everyone say, ‘Gangsta’?”

“Yeah…no. Just go on.”

“Why so serious?-“

Sighhhh. “No.”

“Ok, I know you’ll like this, “Nitty gritty, dirty little freaks?” Hah? Hah?

The manager’s holding his head now. “Uhhhhhh. Very good, Pink. Um, yeah. Go on.”

“If you’re too school for cool”.

“No. No, no no. Just sit, sit! We’ll get someone else to write it, and you just put on your angry face and sing it. OK?

“Hey dude, I’m an artis-“

“Don’t you-don’t you fucking finish that word! Just shut the fuck up right now!”

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The Voca People

27 Oct

Have you seen this before? This group is Israeli, but other than the “Heet me baby won more time”, and the costumes they’ve used since they were still Sperm Man Group, you really can’t tell. They’re great.

Random awesome comment I saw while looking for more beatboxing on youtube: On a video of a 12 year old Russian girl beatboxing- In Russia, the box beat you. Here’s that video.

Most Danceable Songs

24 Oct

There are some songs that come on the radio and just make you dance. You can’t control it. You could be in the middle of getting fired- ‘In Da Club’ comes on overhead, you’ll start tapping your hand under the table subconsciously. You turn on ‘Rock Your Body’ in the morgue, and the corpses will start rigor mortising their heads to the beat. Here’s a few I can’t sit still during:

Rock Your Body

In da Club

Billie Jean

Tik Tok

Another One Bites the Dust

There are some white man songs that come close, but never really hit it. Here are the white man’s best shots:

That’s all

Copacabana

Side note: The top pop music composer for the past 15 years has been a lily-white Scandanavian man (now aged 40 and still pumping out all the top hits). Better start throwing all your cd’s out. (You know, the plastic discs with music on them that used to cost actual money. Find them and throw them out.)

Songs That Still Get To Me

16 Aug

Some songs still get to me. It’s embarrassing (you’ll agree when you see the list) because I’d like to think I’m past some of them, but I guess not. I wonder if  any of these songs hit you too in one way or another when they pop up on the radio- and if not, which ones do?

Zombie

I saw the sign

Jumper

Just one Shabbos (Somehow this one escaped the plague that infected most other Jewish songs for me.)

Kiss Me

Unforgiven 2

My Immortal

Love Story (That was painful to admit)

Dragula (Ok, this is a little more manly)

There are others that I can’t think of now, but I’ll add them in the comments when I remember, no matter what it is. Crap, I was trying to pull up Behind Blue Eyes and I just remembered Behind These Hazel Eyes.

Ma, What Does S&M Mean?

28 Jul

Like some of you out there, I wasn’t allowed to listen to “Non-Jewish music” as a kid. My father was allowed of course, but that was because he lied to us about it. Looking back, that seems to have been the general idea of chinuch in our house.

Anyhow, the reason I bring this up is because I constantly hear complaints about the evils of secular music, movies, etc, from people who I know watch TV and listen to Goyish” Music. “No, that was different, back then music was ok.”  Taken at face value, this statement is ridiculous. What they mean is that music wasn’t as open about it’s meaning. For example, if you wanted to say “have sex” you said “love”. This allowed parents to lie to their children better. When the radio is playing, “I can’t wait till the nights with you, I imagine the things we’ll do”, and your kid asks you what the Scorpions can’t wait for, you can always say, “Monopoly” or “Torah Trivia Contest”. It’s harder when they allow Katy Perry to sing about having “sex on the beach”, and melting your popsicle (which actually sounds dangerous to me).

Is it a bad thing? Well, it probably lowers public decency standards. But does that mean your kids shouldn’t listen to English music? I’ll say this: Definitely not if you’re doing it. The only lesson you’re teaching him is, “This is fun, but you need to feel guilty about it”.  And what about the internet, movies, etc. Are you going to block it all out for him? Come on, your parents did that to you and look how well that turned out. I think that teaching your kids responsibility would remove the need for all these shields. Of course, that’s much harder. But it might be easier on everyone in the long run. Plus you get to listen to your Metallica CD’s in public now.

Please End The Pop Rap

24 Jul


I tried to understand why I don’t like rap songs with music interludes like ‘All of the Lights’, and ‘Coming Home’. I mean, I like the song and the words are solid, what’s the problem?

I think it’s this. I’m trying to listen to music. The opening music part of ‘Coming home’ is great. I’m getting into it. Then some random dude pops in and reads me an essay. I don’t care if it’s the best essay in the world, it’s just distracting.

Someone should just tell him already, “Accept it, Diddy. You’re a good rapper, but you suck at singing. Yes, that means you’ll miss out on the song dollars, but you’ll still sell your rap albums.” Certain things work together, and certain things don’t. Just like I don’t want custard sushi, or wasabi donuts, I don’t want you talking over the song.”

And please, stop trying all these new ways to mesh the two. You’re just killing both of them. Diddy: “Is a house really a home when your loved ones are gone?” Backup singers: “Nooo-whoa.” Owww, stop. Having backup singers answer your rhetorical question is not a step in the right direction.

I’ll let Natasha Leggero rap this up: